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Warning: study these rules one by one. To consider this book as a running narrative is a mistake. To study more than a couple of rules at a time is certainly ill advice.

a) Marry for procreation.
b) Adopt children or medical help if childless.
c) Avoid adultery.
d) Avoid masturbation and sexual petting.
e) Care for a common culture of sublimation.
f) Work on agreement.
g) Care for relatives, tradition and ancestors.
h) Plan sexuality to avoid mutual abuse.
i) Avoid blaming the other.
j) Be clear and converse about relevant social topics.
k) Care for emancipation of you and your partner.
l) Hold together in education.
m) Consult impartial outsiders in case of conflicts of power.
n) In case of divorce separate the possessions.
o) Avoid violence with and against children.
p) Treat children as equal as possible.
q) Have days of festivity and leisure.
r) Go out with the family.
s) Play and appreciate the media together.
t) Beware of making dependence.
u) Keep former relations and be charitable.
v) Have some private space for each.
w) Share your secrets.
x) Take care of surprises and alternatives.
y) Keep the house tidy.
z) Bear poverty, adversity, disease and loss.

 

  

            a) Marry for procreation.

The commitment a (wo)man makes to the world compares to the commitment to a women (or man). The world is there made from matter and maintained by material activity. A woman is also a material manifestation of mankind. The demand of the relation is love: the man must be love to the world as well as to the woman. Childless one can practice the art of making and maintaining love for a long time, but unfulfilled the sexual drive will drop away and seek other ways of manifestation. Fulfillment of relating to the world and the other (of also the same) sex is defined by material outcome: there must be a product; a child or cultural artifact. As said before the highest product is peace with the more mindful work being closer to the soul than the material gratification of the lower senses only. Anyhow to any marriage there must be a form of material outcome. Even the spiritual marriage of a nun to her convent and Lordship is in need of the expression of her material service to the order: holy articles e.g. are also matters of fact. A preacher to a religion must talk people together as a material proof of success. Thus a normal material marriage between a man and a wife has the simplest basic duty of procreation. The nature of marriage will change dropping the simple sexual motive for another outcome. The more cultural the outcome, the less probable (necessary) the marriage will be. Solution to this problem is to be productive for the soul making conscience and selfremembrance. To each making though there is the shadow of passion preaching the necessity out of dissatisfaction with its absence. This shadow can take the form of anger, lust, jealousy and fear (pict.&pict.), defining the pain of evolution. The closer to the interest of the soul the greater the chance of purification from the shadow and of harmonizing with the existent as an expansion. Forgetting the interest of the soul will spoil the chance for purification and make the contribution a repression instead of an expansion. Unpurified, repressing one goes downhill ending in madness, disease, war and degradation. 

 

            b) Adopt children or medical help if childless.

Not rarely marriage goes without the blessing of offspring. This way people can be very unhappy and unfulfilled. Marriage should not be the selfservice of one's own lovemaking these people realize. Love is in need of an outcome is the general rule. The energy invested must give some return. One can feel terribly exhausted losing all tolerance for further engagement finding love unfulfilled. Marriage is thus seen a process of dating, engaging, marrying, and begetting children; clearly a material definition. Following this definition not having offspring would necessitate the adoption of children or even a medical intervention to promote against the will of nature. Especially the latter option is heavily doubted. One does not recognize the physician as a representative of God forgiving people their sins by mending the broken chains of natural consequence. Ovaries can be blocked, seed can have lost vital capacity and stress might cause rejection of the unborn. Recognizing people as servants and representatives of divine providence can be under the condition of consent to an order that encompasses the holy, the traditions and the natural logic. A physician in respect of the eternal values, not being estranged from traditions or the logic of nature, can be considered a representative and thus be trusted as a high priest of healthcare. To God and soul everything may be tolerated, while forgetting that interest the same thing would be despicable. It is not what one does, but the way it is done, that is decisive. The social control of the order of the basic values is as said the guarantee for proper functioning and thus only by overcoming the fears of formal identification and liberation the integration of science, religion, politics and natural demands can be.

To a less material definition of marriage the same holds for begetting other material byproducts than children. For writing books, plays, painting paintings, building houses etc. one does not need to be sexual. On the contrary postponement of the act will show the subliminal culture of creation as a game of sexual attraction without engaging in the sexual act (thus liberating sex in fact from its cultural isolation). The same way as a rooster can have feathers to enhance his sexual outlook, culture can have religion to protect the sexual interest. By the culture oF celibacy the animal interest of material marriage can be covered. Religiously it is called a sacrament, scientifically professional commitment and politically party-membership. All together culture produces a lot more than just according to the natural instinct for offspring. Also failing to contribute culturally because one's receptivity is blocked, the vitality of continence doesn't function or cultural influences hinder the inspiration, one can resort to the help of 'doctors' or adoption of the cultural products of someone else. This way the West got all kinds of foreign teachers, while foreign countries got all kinds of western help and equipment. Although equally doubted as well, in short by integration of the worldculture everybody can progress despite the fruitless marriages of a selfcontaining culture. What holds for physicians helping fruitless couples physically can also be true for teachers and authorities helping other cultures to progress: if there is a common concept of order to the divine of the eternal values all the strange and doubted can be tolerated. 

 

            c) Avoid adultery.

What is adultery? It is not simply the marital infidelity. It is much more. It is like heresy, a revolt or revolution against the constraint of culture. People take it as a disaster of marriage; a personal thing. In fact it is a cultural problem. Everybody desires after the fullness of God in fact in need of emancipation from a low level to a higher level of culture (pict.). Not acquainted with the content of emancipation (pict.) people simply displace the problem resorting to adultery and the like being deluded by the material affair. The fullness of God pertains to beauty, fame, power,renunciation, knowledge and riches (pict.). The church and the nobles used to give evidence of this. But not grasping the logic of these effects the whole concept of emancipation and surrender to the order of liberation is obscured. One does not attain by attachment to any of the effects of the Order of Time. What is decisive is to evolve, progress, expand and contain with time learning that it is quality and not quantity that counts. It is not what one does or has, but , again, how it is done and owned. From that the logic of fullness will be evident.

The name of content is found in the conscientious remembering self that evolves through different layers from the physical to the powerful, from powerful to the social, from the social to the heartful, from the heartful to the confessionate, from the confessionate to the insightful and from the insightful to the true of the divine self (pict.). On the course of this personal and collective evolution one realizes the logic of the fullness showing itself as the life of knowledge in renunciation attaining riches by sharing, beauty by harmonizing, fame by celebration and power by consent (pict.). Not knowing because of attachment, stealing riches, desiring beauty in disharmony, losing fame by celebrating egoistically, and corrupting power by breeding opposition one defines the true nature of adultery. This is how not only the wife, but the whole world is betrayed by unfaithfulness to the soul's interest of emancipation. Remembering the importance of emancipation to the interest of the soul from the beginning of marriage will keep from adultery or render it unimportant if it happened. To the basic values adultery is simply the unclean. 

 

            d) Avoid masturbation and sexual petting.

As with adultery the other most popular alternatives of sexuality are part of the same escapism. It does not really matter if you divert yourself in adultery, petting one another or masturbating the frustrations away. It is all part of the same problem of personal and collective evolution. In a system that is confused and out of balance and exhausted in its possibilities, there is nothing left but progress by the exploration of alternatives enriching life as a whole eventually transforming our ways and opening the gates of evolution to a higher level of civilization. It is good to be heartful from the schools of religion, science and politics. Certainly a lot has been attained to the level of the heart. But what is the collective confession about? One tries to escape in perversions fearing the unknown and the consequence of confessing to the truth's already realized for so long. Rather have that as a painting on the wall or a book of criticism in in the bookcase or have it neatly organized in a computer !?. Delving in illusory concepts of enlightenment one clings to the freedom of a private unlimited of the informal suffering all kinds of madness, identityconfusion, uncertainty, delusion, anxiety and other mental derangement. It is no wonder that many marriages fail because of missing the essential of personal and cultural progress. The heartful of material culture, supported by politics, science, religion and holidays for 'the enlightenment of nature' does not free one from the neurotic and schizoid of modernity. Heartful of matter one runs dry impersonal, politics suffer their endlessquarrels of opposition, religion loses in fixations, science on the profitmotive and the love for nature fails on a lack of cultural positivity. Just to make money and enjoy, to work and pray is not enough. It needs further integration (pict.). Next to days of working, the saturday for the homereligion and the sunday for penance from the fruitive motive, one also needs days to be merely social and outgoing no longer keeping distance with the media, days of study and contemplation without fruitive activity or socializing, and days of celebrating natural order as the prime of God (table). To keep mankind as a whole and the individual on himself from the escapism of the sexual alternative one simply has to formulate and investigate an acceptable alternative that is no repression but a suitable candidate to expand to. Twentiest century culture is like a plant in a pot too small. It takes some care to have the sexual roots not growing into themselves like with masturbation and sexual petting. An exception to this rule is all sexual approach within the context of foreplay: as long as the goal is procreation it is not unholy to stimulate each other sexually. 

 

            e) Care for a common culture of sublimation.

If the sexual habits must change as the waste of that energy is not productive and runs dry on being no solution at all, there must be transformation of that energy. Taking that energy on the higher level of exerting power, being social, going for the heart, confessing to a higher order, gaining insight and finding the fullness of the divine in everyday life, a common culture of sublimation is of the highest importance (pict.). No marriage between individuals or between individuals and the world will last without a conscious control of culture by settlement to the demands of power, society, the heart, confession, insight and divine integration. Power needs fixation by global legislation, society by divisions of statusorientation (pict.), the heart by formalization, confession by initiation, insight by scripture, and divine integration by settlement of continence in everyday life (pict.).

To the individual that wants to subscribe to this, as worldorder can only evolve from him, this practically means that a common second worldlanguage must be learned by all which will be English, the language of the new informationculture. Only with a common command of language a common law can be attained. Secondly the individual may identify with the system of statusorientation (also see pict.) as formulated in previous chapters to settle the identity as a candidate without any further initiation, confession or control. Thirdly one may sublimate to the heart by formally recognizing one another as a candidate to get obliged to the order as one likes. This formal engaging can fourth be confirmed by initiation, that is to say public confession to the basic values on all three levels of commitment (aspirant, recognized, advanced)(pict.): 'loyal and honest I shall care and share to the honor of my commitment'. Fifth the individual may delve in meditation on the scripture, and contribute himself in writing and/or teaching thereto while finally sixth, he or she may fully surrender to the service of the soul by answering to the demands of the order and its association. This final surrender would logically mean that such a person may expect all care from others as one cares oneself without any further exchange of money or goods. In the ideal situation with many members of full surrender the order would fully care for all the needs of the individual, like a family that cares for its children.

Next to all this formality on a realistic level of not having attained to anything of these ideals of personal liberation any marriage may still be endeavoring to contain on the sublimation of being engaged in a division of labor, formally confirmed by legal marriage, outspoken in moral confession, considerate of spiritual knowledge and positive to any congregation of the divine. To have a common culture is the best guarantee of continence.  

 

            f) Work on agreement.

Of course tripping the ego can be but will not suffice. As an experiment anyone can try anything, just like an artist. To have a marriage or commitment to the world at large really working though, agreements are needed. People in love may be private in their interest, but sooner or later the involvement with the greater society will prove itself in need of confirmation. As no one is an island, neither a couple or other 'folie a deux' can continue without further adaptation and integration. Social control might be a great hindrance as all kinds of deafness, cowardice and prejudice may judge and block the private experiment of evolution. Evolution means either pain or madness, death or disease and to walk the tight rope in between is not a simply social or anti-social affair. In fact to the God of Time constantly amending is required with a firm hold on the science of the soul being the best guarantee of continuation.

Going without any confirmation can be for a while, but totally out of the dialectic of the communal one will certainly burn up to ones own initiative. Therefore it is of great importance that as well as the individual as society at large stays alert to the expressions of selfrealisation that might seem rebellious, heretic or immoral and deviant. To judge one another is easy, but to understand is a bit more difficult. A society or individual not receptive to the reality of progress in general, or the signs of individual growth, cannot correct itself, nor control itself or confirm and celebrate itself. Within each marriage and between society and the married this alert to the reality of change is equally important. With no positive development at least the signs of an obstructed development should be timely noticed to prevent madness and disease.  

 

            g) Care for relatives, tradition and ancestors.

From the fundamental value of caring as a cornerstone of the house of culture can be said that traditionally in respect of the ancestral, relatives should care for the human interest without any expectation of return. Contrary to care there is selfhood that lacks in compassion and excels in competition. Competition might be a nice concept to play a game with, but to the interest of compassion it might be deleterious. Compassion is not a simple sentiment of sympathizing with the weak and needy. It is a big difference whether one looks down upon or is really selfless willing to live with. It makes a lot of difference to feel and live with human beings only or with the greater of nature in totality. What is tradition, whom do we call brothers and sisters and whom do we owe it to?. A narrow mind sees the wife and children only, like any selfish animal seeing the rest as competition or fodder. A broad mind might be more intelligent recognizing the interest of strangers and other species as one's own and the interest in other woman as a challenge for emancipation to realize equal human beings. To the tradition of mankind there is a lot of confusion about what our roots really are: are we meateaters competing with the greatest predators eventually devouring each other too or are we naturally primates predominantly vegetarian of interest living in peace and harmony with nature as a kind of potter-monkey? Especially because of populationgrowth the answer to the question becomes pressing. Following the lead of compassion as the key for the concept of proper care having the concept of competition and its selfhood as an opposite of predatory interest, one could logically hold on to the vegetarian way of life as an attainable idea of the future. The vegetarian is certainly the tradition of the spiritual discipline that founded our present culture making the sympathy with the neanderthaler love for hunting and gathering less dominant.

Not just considering the future of mankind as a whole but also the interest of maintaining within a marriage, the tuning down of passion by the lead of compassion seems to be an essential born from the eternal values of the soul (pict.). Practically this means that to love relatives, to be in touch with a broader concept of the ancestral and to have some respect of cultural tradition simply following the vegetarian motive replacing the meatproduct with bean- and dairy-products is indicated. Less the passion and more the compassion, there will be less adulterous deviation, more interest in human emancipation, less estrangement from relatives and the interest of harmony with the greater of nature and more continence in respect of the ancestral foundation of the spiritual part of culture.  

 

            h) Plan sexuality to avoid mutual abuse.

Sexuality is a very important issue to maintaining a marriage or keep the family of mankind together. Sex is the greatest love man knows. Of God it is the most popular characteristic wanted. The divine of sex is everybodies ideal and dream. Sober reality though dictates it a bit different: culture frustrates the primal drive of sex to keep us really brothers and sisters and once engaged in sex very quickly lovers notice the dangers of abusing one another selfishly. Love and lust are easily confused and not knowing the difference can give rise to a lot of relational troubles. Not rarely all kinds of tension are artificially created because of justifying the sexual release. Sex can become compulsive and neurotic losing all selfconfidence and personal certainty and respect. It can become a bad habit or an addiction. What is worse than spoiling the most beautiful of physical love there is?

In sum the sexual is always in need of regulation. We can't just do it in the road or with any stranger anywhere as abuse is bound to give trouble. A license is customary to guarantee the approval of the community: for sex one legally and religiously marries. Without it also settlements are needed: contracts for living together or keeping the bond as it is on mutual agreement. In fact lust is turned into love by all this kind of regulation. Whether the sexual motive dominates or the cultural motive, whether one marries before having sex or after, nobody likes to be abused and everybody thus is in need of a settlement of sex. Often people resort to masturbation in the face of all cultural frustration because of planning the sexual thing. But also to oneself the same truth is valid. Is there a real difference in relating to oneself sexually or involving someone else in the habit? What really counts is the ability to cope with the dynamic and complexity of culture. Losing the ability one may pervert or perverting sexually one may lose the ability. It can be a vicious circle. Good sex and good culture is what the real marriage with her and/or the world is all about. 

 

            i ) Avoid blaming the other.

The most famous of the human fall-down is the theory of attribution. Who is to blame for all the trouble: is it the meateater, the fundamentalist, the damn scientist, the wicket politician, the pervert, the wild artist. Who is the devil in person anyway? Aren't there enough criminals already? All this accusing and persecuting ofscapegoats in the name of some attribution-theory is a shadow of the need of a personal God. Thepersonal God is formed from the wicked of man that is in need of chastisement. The classical hero,knight, prophet, supreme personality, saint etc., descends from heaven with the judgment of Godmoralizing for better behavior in the sense of depending more on the soul than on material gratification. It is because mankind as a whole deviates from the 'straight path' and not because some single person would be bad. Just as it is unwise not to respect the missionary of God, it is equally unwise to consider any person in particular responsible for all the evil in the world. It is from this logic quite clear that missing the missionary gives the shadow of accusing scapegoats. And we can't always expect the God from heaven to take all the blame to protect us from that shadow. Studying the teachings of all these hero's of God selflessness is the motive of their preaching and acting. They do not particularly ask men to kiss their feet, although they allow, they always ask to take mature selfresponsibility of having a good conscience to the interest of the soul. Considering this the general rule of not blaming anyone and especially not the Godhead in person is evident: always blame yourselves and not the other. I am the one who failed to cope with the complexity of her and the world. No blaming of others will be anything but cowardice, prejudice and deafness: monkeybusiness. Incarcerating criminals accused of the (d)evil can only have this as a goal: each should search within himself fighting the evil. It is just that some people are more imprisoned than others as liberation in surrender to the service of the soul is possible. This is also true for the confinement that makes up the marital agreement. 

 

            j) Be clear and converse about relevant social topics.

Clarity is love. Keeping things unclear in the secrecy of hidden cultures fond about their precious continence, a lot of love is lacking in the world. Secrecy, initiation and betrayal are dominant themes of mankind. The more doubtful the culture is, the more hidden the reality. Openness is generally considered a sign of strength: tell the whole world the Lord took the burden of His own shadow (pict.), tell the whole world about the invention that is in the interest of all. No buying and selling is the ideal. No pricetag on the interest of the truth. This is the ideal of an open culture where anyone may know anything from public libraries and information-networks. The meaning of secrecy is found in the silence that covers the weaknesses. The weakness may not be betrayed: it is private, a professional secret or a professional aberration to which the previous rule of selfresponsible non-accusation applies. It is even a psychological law: a person can only continue on a positive selfimage, despite of the weaknesses, eventually defending the most improbable of consonance. The lawyer will defend it in court, the psychologist will defend it in the counselingroom, the spouse will defend it in marriage and the priest will absolve it on confession. Clarity is love and to be clear about one's loyalty is of the greatest importance. Therefore to give evidence of loyalty to the order of the soul is of prime importance making liberation in service the prime motive of action. This clarity not only safeguards the holiness of matrimony but also the redemption of mankind. In this sense the tabloid taste for slander is nothing but betrayal while the confessions of the one's reborn to the order make the reality of belief in the true real.

To converse means to be opposite openly and implies to do that by means of the word. It is, properly, the same service in clarity that fears no confrontation or opportunity to surrender to the interest of the soul. This is the way of becoming a happy person. Nothing as bad as a heart full of murder and a mouth unable to speak. A good marriage is characterized by a healthy sense of communal interest to which there is open communication. Therapy, politics and religion can be the topics avoided with friends but to members of a family political and religious conversing or talking to a scientific paradigm is the way of confirming the bond.  

 

            k) Care for emancipation of you and your partner.

Within a marriage it is quite clear what care for emancipation means: the woman has the same right as the man. Despite of the biological difference both may work, study, vote and stay home with the children. Parting ways of adopting another religion, political party or scientific paradigm not necessarily lead to separation, although it often does. Emancipation always brings the risk of estrangement. Sobering up from the regressions of lust one may discover not to have or be a suitable partner at all. One may decide to go for the soul and tolerate the difference of the estrangement or even like it, or one may decide to go for the culture, remarry and not tolerate the estrangement. In emancipation culture and the personal soul can grow opposite. Not rarely people continue on their regressions fearing the burden of emancipation eventually fostering diseases blocking their energies. Attachment is the root of all suffering as such. The greatest chance of success is to emancipate to cultures that hold on to traditional ways of keeping the soul. The more experimental, sectarian and speculative the sublimationculture, the greater the chance of divorce and estrangement.

The ideal is cultural progress covering the whole of society. For that a simple concept of soul is needed with a concrete generally accepted form of God. In sum the answer seems to be that attaining to a conscientious (soulful) remembrance of the order of time (God) is a proper basis for human progress. Practically man and woman should agree about who does what at which time. To the greater concept of the emancipation of a worldculture, mankind relating to nature also should agree about who does what at which time (pict.). It is not simply having the same rights and then competing until death follows. Emancipation with soul means conscientious reckoning with each other and thus the afore mentioned. 

 

            l) Hold together in education.

In raising children it is important to have consistency. In emancipated, mixed marriages this can be a problem. Emancipation also means that one has to accept the dynamic of personal evolution. Different stages of development follow one another (pict.) and children do not always match with this. Children may get very confused, disappointed and neglected. A writer also may write a book and adopt to that a complete of culture, just to drop it later on to write another book. Still those 'byproducts', the children, the books are in need of proper respect. Therefore a common cultural basis is needed to which couples privately and greater cultures collectively agree in order to take care of the proper educational and filognostical (loving the books) continuity. As mentioned above an agreement of conscientious action to the order of Time is needed. Such an order has been discussed in the previous chapters. To the cultural importance of a denominator of formal identity also a structure of statusorientation (pict.&pict) and commitment (pict.) has been discussed. On the basis of an alternative order of time (tables) and a settlement of identity (pict.)for emancipation and social control one can find solidity for the purpose of filognosy and education. Properly founded in the charitable, that is to say in voluntary service, such a respect of order can replace the parents that drop away because of disturbances of personal evolution. All kinds of things can go wrong and a community must learn to take collectively responsibility for such calamities. The dictate of personal freedom is a heavy one, and not wanting to spoil the children, lose the love of knowledge or the honor of soulful emancipation, there must be provided for a proper continuity of culture for everyone. Only on the basis of equal chances for all real worldpeace can be. Forming elites may happen, but cannot be the dominant theme. Openness to each, also of the past and the future, defines the health of progress and the sanity of any system of management. 

 

            m) Consult impartial outsiders in case of conflicts of power.

Losing touch with the interest of the soul, deluded by the attraction of material nature, couples can stray from the path of emancipation (pict. & pict.) and explore the less righteous realms of human activity. From that one certainly learns about the limits and borderlines not to transgress. Another unwanted effect of such an experience is the conflict of power. Experimenting one easily loses the authority and certainty of the culture and order of the soul. Trying to have the power oneself in a deluded and perverted concept of authority and maturity one may end up in a relational hell. The dear lover becomes a dictator and the dear life becomes a lie. In order to find a safe way home, back to the good and real of Time, one may temporarily accept to regress to a situation of apprenticeship in order to regain the discipline lost. For that help is often needed. Just by books alone it is difficult to progress at all. Some things are purely social and lots of knowledge and rulegiving is unwritten. In order to learn something there is also the source of outside authorities and other seekers of the truth of personal emancipation (pict.). To that there are priests, politicians and scientific therapists teaching and healing according their beliefsystems, policies, and paradigms. Each system may claim to be exclusive and the one and only solution, but political reality learns us that evidently the coexistence of all is the need. Whatever system of management adopted, each will hold on to its own agreements. One may participate as far as one can but to change it will be difficult or impossible. There is a law of nature that commands the coexistence and continence of the diversity of all beings and only onlosing function and adaptation species die out. Culture is not different from this: complexity may increase but to repress the existent is a war. For instance to time we had the old dynamic definition valid for thousands of years to the reality of the heavenly bodies. Later was added the electromagnetic definition of time defining the stability of the measured unit by means of the element Cesium. That atomic concept of time though did not really undo the authority of the sundial defining the dynamic of time. Still the exact length of atomically counted timeunits as hours and days, must be corrected to the evident instability of the mean of its natural length (earth progressively spins slower to the sun). The law of Time is that it has to change; no measure will hold however much we are fixed to a standard unit of measurement. The difference between what one measures and with what one measures dictates a dual concept of validity when it comes to the settlement of a comprehensive order of time. From this example it may be evident why the outside authority is important to overcome the powerconflicts and psychology within a certain system of management and fixation (pict.). Life ruins all systems and forces them to (re-)adaptation to the outside reality for their survival.  

 

            n) In case of divorce separate the possessions.

Sooner or later the mature person must follow his own course. If it happens to be so that emancipation leads to separation, discovering one does not match beyond the lustprinciple, one simply has to forgive and forget. Detachment is always the problem of progress. Holding on to the material past the need for progress becomes a mental disease. Therefore it is important to separate mine and thine. Being attached to the tokens of one's own culture one has to learn to forget and forgive about the follies and stuff of the other person. The infatuation of love leads to attachment to all kinds of behavior and stuff one cannot forget so easily: it makes two fools that should not accuse each other of one's own madness. Separation of the possessions draws a line between two attached people who cannot agree about what to detach from for what purpose. Of course it would be nice if the partners would agree about a common culture of sublimation and detachment. But often this is not the case.

Being in love with the world, getting disappointed about it and settling for another course of and stopping with it is as difficult as giving up an addiction. Not only one is conditioned to the behavioral pattern that no longer satisfies, also the world is conditioned to expect nothing but that. Conversed to another style of life suddenly the 'whole world' drops away, friendships do not work, employment has to change, another language is spoken. In the beginning emancipation can be very bitter discovering only after some time how sweet it can be. On the contrary in the beginning lust and attachment can be very sweet, just to discover after some time that when the excitement is over one is caught in a bitter battle against slavery and boredom. Because of the former one should not separate and because of the latter one should not hate each other. Ultimately selfrealisation is the result of what one has realized oneself and true love recognizes it in the other.

To the reality of time mankind has the same problem. Fallen in love with the modern we ended up in attachment to timezones that are not really needed and a calendar stemming from before the year zero that is nothing but a confusion of different timedivisions and policies. Separating mine and thine the ones attached to the past should be able to continue while the people who follow the simpler scheme of true world time (GMT corrected for the time-equation eventually adapted to one's place) and a 24-division-calender (see tables) should be happy with their alternative and ideal of harmonizing with nature and reason. To regard the complexity of peaceful coexistence as a whole the design for a new type of clock can as said before be respected. 

 

            o) Avoid violence with and against children.

Not recognizing one's own ignorance children are often hated by the parents who, struggling with the mature command of selfresponsibility discover aggravation by the dependence and dictates of childhood. In stead of becoming free selfrealizing emancipating individuals parents have to suffer the slavery of the workload of their former lusts. The lustprinciple is not overcome in a day: it brings a whole world of consequence that is naturally settled by having offspring. The most simple things like eating, behaving, toilettraining etc. have to be learned over and over until a healthy sense of reality dominates the innocence of life (pict,). Failing to cope with this workload estranged from the paternal authoritative attitude people go to hell needing reeducation in mental institutes, monasteries, counselingrooms and other trainings. Lots of human life is all about this business of taking the workload of former lust. It is quite normal and nothing to be ashamed about. Mankind always had pilgrimages, religions and other occupations to cope with it and in the future it will continue to exist in the same or another form. Also the order proposed in this writing in the form of another clock and discipline of statusorientation forms a workload that is an intermediate between the old lust and the new outcome of simply another calender and the same old clock managed to the sun as it should. It simply might take a thousand years to have the whole world culturally unified on an improved timepolicy. Because of everybody having his own way a great complexity is to be worked at while ultimately it is nothing but the evolutionary pain of progressing one step in the management of time and identity. With this burden in the personal sphere of raising children or caring for the precious artifacts of one's own culture, violence must be avoided. Violence is the result of frustration being confronted with more trouble and work than would be wanted, needed or wished for. To curb the underlying desire that steals the sanity of mind is as said done by regulation in the political, religious, scientific and natural, personal sphere. 

 

            p) Treat children as equal as possible.

The fall of intelligence is shown in the relationship with the ignorant and innocent. The more debilitated the culture the more severe the relations between parent and children, teachers and pupils, priests and believers, governments and citizens. With no sinners no religions would be needed, with no profiteers no security-order would exist, with no fallen souls no teachers would be beyond the parental and with no lust no humbling would have to take place. Parents humble children seeing them as the little devils of their own lust. Priests have to preach at people having to accept the common sins of the flesh, governments have to pay endlessly for social security not able to demand anything material back because of the profitmotive and teachers have to repeat the lessons over and over since people lose their intelligence constantly in the fall of the soul. Once settled though for the realityprinciple (pict.), priests, teachers, politicians and parents have to learn to treat the fellow men not as a victim but as an equal partner. The other is not simply a subject of state, a child, a pupil or a sinner. It is in the elevation above the other that selfawareness is lost and enmity looms with revolutions against false classdistinction and wars against estrangement. Therefore the rule of treating in principle pupils, children, believers and subjects of state as equal as possible: it is a demand of selfhumiliation: I am myself a profiteer, fallen soul, sinner and pupil. I am the one in need of emancipation and thus I will not only liberate myself, but the whole world of my preaching, teaching, manipulating and belittling. 

 

            q) Have days of festivity and leisure.

As discussed earlier just to work and pray is not enough. Especially in a culture in which the media have become very prominent a great deal of work is done for the sake of keeping distance. More and more people living closer and closer to each other necessitate the informationculture that overcomes estrangement at the one hand and keeps the people separated at the other hand. Thus watching television has become almost a profession of peacekeeping by social security with the multimediacomputer as an answer to the problem of oneway-information. Of course keeping distance and confirming distance may not go on endlessly. It might be a job in an overpopulated world but to each job there should be a counterweight. Work and leisure should alternate, and thus keeping distance and even confirming distance, must be alternated by the contrary: one must cover the distance and be present no longer trying to confirm the distance but contact in the real. Practically this takes the form of a new type of repose: a media arrest on days to an alternate scheme to contrast the culture and timeconsciousness. Thus we have sundays and saturdays that might be of a religious or familial repose but still mean working at the media. Thus we have workingdays ignoring the media, solely meant for free association in social presence for the sake of social control. And there are days that both types cover one another because of the contrasting consciousness of the different timeschedules (tables). This is the complexity of postmodern informationculture: it is so complex and diverse that separate days are needed just for study and contemplation - not working for the distance or the profit or for going out - and days for celebrating a new season and forget about everything else. From the chaos of free exploration of all human potential a new type of order arises settling everything to its own nature: the politics of time, the appliances of science, the religions of the old and new age and the natural order of the ancestors. Thus modern man can retrieve his lost soul having extra days of festivity and leisure redefining the concept of work and celebrating holidays. 

 

            r) Go out with the family.

For each marriage not only a conscious approach of scheduling to time is needed to cover the whole of culture, also keeping together with it is important. What the celibate in his freedom of selfrealisation might settle wouldn't be different to the interest of the family. To go out together, having children or not is terribly important to keep the marriage or partnership vital. One consciousness contrasting the other changing from private to public, from repose to work and from culture to nature, man and woman learn to know themselves better which will improve the quality of their marriage. Marriage is thus not only an economic agreement, a childrearing modus, a religious agreement or a natural lust of life. It can be a complete diverse enough to be interesting for the rest of your life. It can be a liberation to an order that has a clearly set goal for the future. It can be a motivator that keeps from selfdestruction and falldown. It can be a way of being outgoing to the world at large without losing the continence of the family or the liberty of the celibate. 

 

            s) Play and appreciate the media together.

There are two things that people tend to forget in the philosophy of prayer and work: play and appreciate together. Growing up people quickly learn that to live means to go for a profit, be it making money or making peace. But once having acquired the goods and the peaceful settlement of their wanting, they still must learn to appreciate and play. Going for your own thing the ego goes in refutation of everything else: openness is lost, competition is bred. Also seriously believing in one's own game, having made it a profession and a strategy of domination the sense of playfulness is also lost. One has become a piece of chagrin that is no longer sensitive to the fun of life. The one who always wanted to win turns out to have lost the most precious: the innocence of the children's soul that plays and wonders about all. Thus it is very important to settle one's schedules for the sake of appreciating the offerings of the fellow-man and to take time to play a game free from the profitmotive.

For appreciation we have all kinds of media: radio, television, video, magazines, newspapers, books, c.d.'s, tape's, computers, telephones and the like. There is a difference in the media that support direct communication, like television, radio and the internetcomputer-telephone connectionand the media that are less direct, a fixation, and quickly a possession that leads to accumulation and bewilderment by attachment and fall-down. The greater the timelapse between sending and receiving the more difficult it becomes to experience the communication as being alive. Slow media like books, newspapers, films etc. depend on a collective interest at more or less the same moment so that something may be in vogue but a week later may be forgotten. The same thing one year being 'in' can hardly be appreciated the other year considered to be outdated. Books are best red by a studygroup or religion as in essence each message is a social reality. Thus one can understand why it is sometimes difficult or impossible to read a book, however good it may be. Reading a novel one communicates with the writer tuning in on the theme that one must live oneself somehow. Thus one's literatures, records, films etc. represent one's life and ego.

For a good marriage to appreciate together is important as culture can represent a lot of ego that does not align to the soul the same way the partner would or could like. Also to have communication as direct as possible with a minimum of distance between the people involved enhances the quality and content of the message and the ability to enjoy it together. This directly leads to the appreciation of theater performances before television, television live-performances before previously fixed programs, cinema-performances before video or televisionperformances, on-line discussion before newspaperpolemics, etc. etc. It is important to have one's priorities clear in the appreciation of the media as ultimately the distance between people must be covered. Essentially the message of each medium is to get together and celebrate the order propagated. Violent and tabloid presentations can be recognized as warnings against keeping distance to much with the wrong idea of discipline. And that we should not celebrate. The message of the medium is to discard it as the human body is the ultimate machine to live with. Playing games one must learn to recognize the same thing: to the soul they must be representative of the eternal values to have an alignment that supports the marital bond or the continence of the celibate. In the games of sport etc. one tends to be fixed on winning with the implication that one never has won before the game is over. The proper philosophy though is that one has always won to begin with and that each game gives the risk of losing. Realizing that to lose the game itself is the greatest danger, the risk of losing points weighs less than the risk to be considered a bad sport who can't stand losing. The golden rule of all games is to play for the game and not so much for the result. Reinforcing the winning of the game with money and other privileges is exactly the way to corrupt it, define war and create victims. For the sake of worldpeace thus in fact all

professional play should be forbidden. It runs into the same pit as violence on television etc.: people forget that their fascination might be about bad habits and creating victims, while the goal of the game was exactly the opposite: to recover the childrens soul of innocence.  

 

            t) Beware of making dependence.

Not emancipated people in marriage and other partnership heavily depend upon each other. It is a bad habit not to share the know-how, to make secrets, to subdue and to foster other strategies of power. It should not be necessary to exert power over each other at all. The powergame is a symptom of lost authority. Lacking the authority of a trustworthy order, people begin to fight about rulership, ownership, right to enjoy and the right to use etc. After the age of twenty-one people should not be the victim of powergames and destructive powerstategies because they lost the authority and have to fight for it themselves. It is primitive culture that does not settle the order of authority because of a lust for opposing in conflict: it is strange to the spirit of playfulness and sharing in appreciation. Having society as a battlefield does not make happy people, not even when they won: you can't buy happiness, nor can you possess it. Happiness comes from being right with Time, that is to say, of successfully aligning to the soul which is the seat of the consciousness of eternal happiness. In the soul all goodness comes together as conscientious selfremembrance containing the best of man as being God or the true self.

In the soul the good is remembered and the bad forgotten: that is how we can forgive and forget. True independence is the result of depending on the soul and its values. Hence all dependence in relating within or outside of marriage should be subdued by the motive for the basic values that guarantee the proper conscience (pict.). Conspiring against it might give the illusion of a bond but is in fact an addiction in service of the senses: the dependency about which always the conflict arises. This dependency one should not make. Practically one should not tempt each other into free sex,meateating, speculating and gambling for mere possessing and betraying the truth with intoxicants. For the frustration of sex we have the cultures of sublimation, for the frustration of meateating we have the delights of the vegetarian kitchen, for the frustration of going for the dough we have the world of games, and for the frustration of non-intoxication we have the cultures of consciousness found in the alternate reality. The cure for the desires of the malingering dependency that ruins all marriage and other partnership is in one phrase: enjoy the sublime, eat with compassion, play for the game and go for the alternate. Once appreciating this dictum, knowing the do's forgetting the don'ts, the frustration will be tolerated and the rebellion overcome. 

 

            u) Keep former relations and be charitable.

Marriage and partnership can be a conspiracy of bad habits. Not rarely the Lord will manifest Himself in the form of a partner to teach the lessons of the eternal values. Sex is offered as a lesson or punishment against egoism, possessiveness, lying and corruption. Lusty one forgets the value of the subliminal continence that feeds with progress by the internal force of the soul: in love you lose your mind building an ego, acquiring possessions, compromising with the truth, and corrupting in sex. Fond of the punishment of love one loses intelligence and does not really progress; one does not really learn. Old allies of celibate continence are lost in the process and the selfless attitude is forgotten in the bewilderment of the outer effect. Willfully keeping former relations and the attitude of charity is the cure for the side-effects of the love-school. It demands the domination of the mode of goodness (pict.), compassion sharing and caring, not strange to the parental instinct hat should go with the sexual preference. Clear is why not to corrupt the instinct of parental care is so important. Selfish sex ruins the alignment with the soul and thus the way out of the clutches of material bewilderment. 

 

            v) Have some private space for each.

As stated earlier to withdraw and recapitulate is important not to get lost in the affairs of the world. Even as a small child for the ego it is important to recover the authentic nature of alignment with the soul in the seclusion of a personal sphere. Missing this escape from the dominant social impositions in education and later on in marriage one may develop mental and social diseases. Forced into the social one may develop destructive attitudes just to get rid of the pressure. This can develop in a negative groupego fostering enmity or even criminal aberration towards others or even worse will breed anti-social behavior of individuals eventually deranging psychiatrically. Society and also marital association must be a free choice (pict.). All things can be appreciated as they are with all their limitations when one is free to refute and withdraw. The material manifest is always full of deficiency and limited. Bound to that with no escape one can get pretty desperate.

Practically a man may withdraw in fishing, an attic or shed for his hobby, while mommy may develop, likewise an afternoon-meditation or nap or may loose herself in needlework and other withdrawn activity. As a private place is not always available one still must try to have one's own thing, activity, chair, play-corner, sewing-table, study-desk etc. instead. 

 

            w) Share your secrets.

As known not everything can be said and revealed. One has to keep front. Although one should not worry too much about one's image, things going really good or bad must not obscure the importance of keeping up the appearance. Thus many people are not as holy and pure as they appear or speak. This is perfectly normal and o.k. This is an eternal practice of human society that demands its members to be loyal to the common standard to which an alternative may not be destructive. It is even one of the greatest forces of mankind: once a certain form of social control is working the whole of society can live in fear of losing that collective honor. In warfare the fear of freedom and emancipation will manifest in enmity thus losing its precious honor: mankind thus lost a lot of precious but wrongly propagated ideals. Honor turning out to be false pride is a drama and trauma for man.

The traditional cure for the disease of falsification by attachment to the outer image is the religious confession. Confession would prevent estrangement from the interest of the soul and forgive the aberration before real derangement in society would take place. In modernity this has taken many other forms: television is like a collective confessionboot putting high demands on the side of the one's who have to 'forgive and forget' appreciating. Psychotherapy would forgive people their egoism in the confession of their weakness while new-age approaches would forgive people their irreligion lacking the traditions. Alternative strategies of alignment kept the honor of modern men preventing individual and collective falldown in the enmity of false pride. All these strategies are founded on sharing the secrets in some or another form of confession. In marriage one might not confess all secrets to the partner, but to have them forgiven by others will not make the marriage better. The cure consists not rarely of the practice of breaking the false pretenses of holiness within a marriage, thus preventing downfall of the marriage itself: it is a bond of strength and weakness proving that honesty will last and that there will always be a difference between God and men, between men and their ideals. Another way of saying it is that to share in the humble of being human is the best way of realizing the common reality and need of an ideal to go for. Man dies when his ideals die. 

 

            x) Take care of surprises and alternatives.

Keeping track with a certain rut can be important but bears the danger of losing consciousness. A rut has a sexual connotation: it can be a form of attachment or bewilderment by material nature. Because of time, the movement of matter, we have consciousness: without change one does not perceive. Even dead immobile objects are perceived because the perceiver changes position or moves his eyes. Staring at an object is an old meditation technique to arise 'above time', meaning to get concentrated and appease the mind. In the repetition of the same old way we have two realities: the natural reality of cyclic time repeating a certain pattern making up the consciousness of normal living beings and the unconcious habit of a conditioning that takes away the consciousness of a living being. The difference between the naturally conscious and the conditioned unconscious lies in the authority to which the living being is subjected. Living beings are structured, form a pattern themselves under the influence of the outside and the inside. The inside pattern is genetically programmed, the outside pattern is a mix of cultural and natural influences. To the authority of the genes not much can be done: if the program does not satisfy there will be stress to mutate for the next generation. To the outside we have in principle a free choice of natural and cultural conditions to suit our taste of life. Culture and nature can harmonize or be in conflict. According to culture we have the authority of other persons: holy men and woman, politicians and scientists who operate by means of their fixations in the form of lawbooks, bibles and contraptions of applied science varying from a simple clock to a complicated computer. To nature we have the authority of natural order, religiously called God, politically called green or ecological and scientifically called time. Time orders nature by showing patterns of cyclical time religiously perceived as God because of its natural confirmation of each genetic code. Politicians have difficulty with time as the movements of nature form a counterpoint of different rhythms to which they simply develop a pragmatical concept of time of their own. In fact mankind deals by means of clockwork with a concept of time that does not exist in nature: it has lost its natural dynamics and suffers induction to a manageable mean-zone-summerconcept of 'standardization'.

Conditioned to the authority of nature one does not lose consciousness because time by nature is dynamic: no measure of time stays the same (apart from the pulse of a quasar). Because of that change we have to stay, under that subtle command, alert as an hour is not an hour a day not a day and a year not a year. That change guarantees the continence of consciousness. To cultural change we have the opposite effect: because of fixing time to a mean, a zone or a season, we lose its dynamic, its adaptation to the place, and its gradual change by nature. With a mean we become rigid and with a zone we lose touch with the space described by time (identity). With summertime you develop a shock of change instead of supple, gradual smooth change. Because of these latter defects of cultural time man suffers being put off, getting exhausted compensating and feeling bad in a state of confusion of identity to the here and now. We speak of cultural neurosis or a collective schizoid condition that might break out in the psychosis of warfare or general criminal disobedience. The latter condition of normal cultural neurosis means estrangement to the command of the soul which inspires to conscience in regard to nature by the instinct of (collective) survival.

Concerning the collective reality of political standardtime not much can be done by an individual: we can only compensate by developing person by person a counterculture of cherishing alternatives and surprises. From this counterculture of surprising each other by means of unexpected alternatives a new concept of time (tables) can evolve as a cure for the pathogenic of standard time. In order not to become chaotic in the love for alternatives, defying expectation, the theme of time should be remembered: it is not to get addicted to drugs, free sex, financial speculation or killing living beings. Lies, deceit, selfhood and possessiveness are symptoms of attachment. Restoring the basic values of truth, loyalty, compassion and sobriety (pict.), the alternative can be trusted to lead the way to a better society with better marriages and a better concept of time with a healthy tolerance for as well the old as the new.  

 

            y) Keep the house tidy.

Literally it seems to be a simple rule for a good marriage. In the context of greater culture it is not as simple though: who is responsible for the chaos of society: who must clean up the seas, the air, the soil and our precious timeawareness? It all went out of control working for the money instead of the ecological green quality, exchanging spiritual happiness for material gratification. Mankind must struggle for survival increasing in population discovering that without the basic virtues of sharing and caring, honesty and loyalty (pict.), we cannot survive. We have by love of truth to accept that killing, intoxicating, lusting and acquiring are not the way to survive collectively. To 'have the house tidy' any married person may try to remember this: the future of mankind as a whole and the individual marriage in particular is in the vegetarian, staying free from intoxicants, regulating the lusts while sharing the cultures. By no way any progress can be expected from promoting the meatdish, swallowing pills, sexual freedom and segregating cultures. These attachments lead to a 'messy house' in which mankind in the long run can not survive. It is not to make a new moral norm and to forbid: there will be always some love for chaos (pict.) messing up to the basic values: testing the limits is allowed as far as the law permits. It is all about seeing to the proper horizon of the ideal, the good of willing and the future of the children. Eating meat one loses the joy of compassion (the willingness to help), intoxicating one's sense of truth (the honesty), promiscuous one become's deceitful (dirty or disloyal), and possessive one loses tolerance (the ability to share). Remembering this it will be no problem to keep the house tidy and the marriage satisfying.  

 

            z) Bear poverty, adversity, disease and loss.

From poverty one discovers the cultures of happiness, from adversity one learns to detach and accept a challenge, from disease one learns to repent and from loss one becomes free. The hindrance (pict.) in the way of all this learning that sooner or later has to be accepted as everybody finds out what it is to be without funds, luck, health and support, is called attachment. One can be attached to riches missing the discipline to survive poor, one can be attached to everything going easy not able to endure any stress or responsibility, one can be attached to one's health getting desperate aging and one can be attached to people and provisions completely debilitated in one's dependency. Nor as an individual, nor as a married couple one can persevere without being confronted with this test of time. Without the firm decision to stay loyal in times of disease, poverty, adversity or loss no relation with each other or oneself can maintain. The loyalty pertains to the basic values (pict.)that guarantee the reality of the soul. Staying rich, healthy, lucky and supported or not, these values guarantee the continuity of personal and marital integrity. 

 

 

 

         
       


  

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